Showing posts from August, 2015

Don't Let Me Agree To This Next Year

It's late, I need to get to bed because we are supposed to get up at the crack of dawn to finish loading the car and hit the road, I'm tired as all get-out - but I need to blog RIGHT NOW so that I remember just how hellish this day-before-vacation was.  Errands, Anna leaving for college (and God bless the friend who helped drive her things down, no way I could have done it today), Larry being called in to work unexpectedly, the girls apparently having none of the right clothes to pack, my realizing after dinner that I still had to EMPTY THE REFRIGERATOR....

Let's just say it wasn't pretty.  I was tossing out plastic containers full of food, left and right, without even stopping to photograph them. What a tragic waste, both of comestibles and of a decent blog post, right?

Larry the workaholic redeemed himself by dealing with the 3-week-old fettucine.  I knew there was a reason I married that man.

Has anyone noticed? Rachel turned 13 last week. THIRTEEN. That means that …

Be Prepared

Quiz: what do 2 kids moving out to college, plus 2 birthdays, plus preparing for a 12-day camping trip look like?

A. 2.4 gazillion trips to Target
B. A lot of pizza for dinner
C. A house that looks as though it threw up on itself
D. All of the above

If you guessed the answer was D, congratulations! If you didn't, well, never mind.  I don't want to hear about how organized you are.

Larry came home last night and said, "So, have you been getting ready for our trip?"

"Sure," I said. "I've figured out which projects I'm bringing, downloaded a few extra patterns in case I change my mind, and inventoried my needles to make sure I have the right ones.  I'm missing a size, but no worries - I can make it to the yarn store tomorrow."

He kept looking at me, so I said, "Did I forget anything?"

"I guess I was hoping you'd say something about clothes or food," he said.

Men - they just need to get their priorities straight.


I forgot that I promised last week to tell y'all about Brian's job search.  You see, he's always been the entrepreneur of the family, making money hauling garbage cans around front for the older ladies of the neighborhood, watering neighborhood plantings, mulching and weeding people's yards.  And it's a good thing, because this kid NEEDS money.  Those Legos aren't going to buy themselves, you know.

Anyway, lately he's been saying he is sick of weeding people's yards and wants a real job - one with air conditioning and maybe an employee discount.  At the local movie theater, say.  Only, he's just 15, which makes it difficult.  Most places won't hire a 15-year-old, because of the restrictions on how many hours they can work during the week.  Never mind that he is a homeschooler, these rules still apply.

So I drove him to a local grocery store which will sometimes hire 15-year-olds to bag groceries. He went in to talk to the manager, while I traile…

Parental Abandonment

Larry drove David to college today.  I know, I should be used to this by now, but truly it isn't the grown teen I am missing.  You see, the problem is that, when a grown teen walks out that door for college, the cute toddler he used to be goes with him.  Oh, I miss that little guy! So my couch is currently strewn with photo albums full of pictures of David, at age 2 and 3 and 4, looking exactly the same as he does now, only trapped in a body that is much shorter and rounder.
It's sort of like Muppet Babies, you know?
Anyway, I felt like grabbing him as he headed to the car and saying, "You do know how much you've meant to me, don't you?" But I didn't, because he doesn't.  He never will.  Parenting, although it has its rewards, is still somewhat of a one-way relationship.  And that's okay.  Most days, anyway.
The past week David spent packing and attempting to clean out his room.  Remember, David is the family packrat.  The engineer/artist in him s…

Child Abandonment And Medieval Pestilence

News round-up time! First, these people are my people. As someone who has left a toddler in both a bakery and in an elevator, I feel nothing but empathy for them. My favorite sentence in the article is "They reportedly asked their other children, a boy and girl, if everything was okay, and no one noticed the toddler was missing."

90 miles - they drove 90 miles before they figured out that someone was missing. Well, actually, they never did figure it out on their own. The police called them.

Summer travel tip for families: if it is too quiet in the back of the car, it is TOO QUIET.

The time we left the toddler (Brian at the time) in an elevator? The other kids and I only realized my mistake when we heard cries of "Mommy! Mommy!" coming from behind the closed doors. We managed to get them open, only to ROFL (all 5 of us) at the sight of the poor kid's face, which was looking as traumatized (and cute) as only a 3-year-old's can look when his family deserts…

Time Flies, Even If You Don't Throw Your Clock Out A Window

I know it's been quiet here, but 2 birthdays plus 2 kids packing for college plus (incipient) shingles has made for a complicated week.

That's right, incipient.  That darn rash hasn't appeared yet, so the doctor won't prescribe the anti-viral drugs for me. Any guesses as to when it WILL appear?  Say, on the first day of our 14-hour trip to Maine for a 10-day camping vacation in a remote location far from medical care? BINGO!

Luckily, I've figured out the magic painkiller combo that allows me to function (tylenol and aspirin - who knew?).  Also, ice packs.  All those fancy anti-inflammatories and narcotics now crowding my medicine cabinet? Worthless.  I've been told the pain gets worse once the rash appears, though. Gosh, I cannot wait.

Those comfy bras I ordered? 2 were a joke - apparently, XL and XXL do not refer to the cup size but to the circumference.  As I am a 32G, that did me not one whit of good.  The third bra sort of fits, but still feels uncomfortab…

Any Excuse For Some Online Shopping

Remember this post? Where I theorized that the stinging, burning pain along my rib cage was caused by an allergic reaction to the metal in my bra?  Well, it got worse and was mostly on the left side, so I decided I was dying of pancreatic cancer (because hypochondria, of course).  I called a friend to tell her the bad news, and she convinced me that maybe it would be a good idea to get an opinion from someone who was actually, you know, a medical doctor; that is, one of those people who, unlike myself, have actually spent several years studying the human body and all that can go wrong with it.

My friend is sensible that way.

So, convinced that I was going to be handed a death sentence, I headed off to the medical center this morning, weeping a little inside at the thought of my 2 youngest having to grow up without me.  Poor motherless creatures! And let's not even talk about how haunted I felt by the thought of all the family photos I haven't sorted through yet.  The guilt was…